Terror

In the night, they come for me…
The eyes so wide and huge…
They stare at me blindly; I’m unable to move.

They reach their fingers out towards me.
My heart, it skips a beat.
Soon they will all come for me; I still have no retreat…

My sweat, it pours from my flesh. The cold air makes it
steam. The blackness, it surrounds me now.

I can’t even scream.

They are coming for me…

T.L. Stafford

12/2017

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51 comments

  1. Reminds me of my lady in a rocking chair. P.S. Today is my birthday: Seventy two and eyes that are blue. I wrote todays blog for you. I hope you enjoy it. I see you entered the dark side with this post.

      • Yeah. It is hard to get past. When the adult thoughts leave and there is nothing but pure adrenaline and panic. I’m sorry you have had to experience them also… I can’t get past it sometimes.

      • The trauma symptoms appeared with full force about 10 years ago. I don’t let the panic attacks keep me in doors. I go out and distract myself with twitter when I feel an attack coming on. My therapist says these panic attacks are actually an expression of anger in my case, so rage tweeting works just fine. 🙂

      • Twitter raging! heh… If it works!! 🙂 I should see a therapist again some day. I just sort of quit most “doctors” about six years ago… Been awhile since a head doc was on my case.

      • It helps if the shrink believes in the existence of the mind and the human soul. A therapist
        who is afraid of human suffering is useless to people with PTSD. I see a psychotherapist who
        specializes in trauma. I didn’t know what was in my head.

        Seeing a good psychotherapist is what kept me alive.

      • That is so great! I am glad you found someone to help you.

        My last therapist told me, and I quote, “I have never ever had depression or anxiety… This is how…” As she continued to talk. I am sure I looked dumbfounded. Never? How can someone say that? I couldn’t believe her statement.

        Was she some kind of a Psychopath/sociopath trying to help me understand
        and deal with my inner feelings/memories and anxiety?

        “Never?” I asked her. She said something affirming her previous statement.
        I asked her again…
        “Never?”

        I couldn’t get past it. So I left. There wasn’t anyone else available to me at the time. Big city programs, and me being a no money guy dealing with Cancer/PTSD/OCD bull crap…
        No one else had time to see me…

        I couldn’t get past her “never…”

        I think it is amazing you found someone you could trust and help you!!!

      • What was the context of that kind of that comment? What kind of therapist tells her client that she has no capacity for understanding his feelings of depression and anxiety?

        I am extremely fortunate to have this therapist. I wish everyone with a mental illness had access to proper treatment. We can lead productive lives when the medical system isn’t trying to kill us with lethal neglect.

  2. I am so sorry you experience this. Night terrors have only happened to me a handful of times but nightmares more often. This was so chilling and perfectly expressed. It is such an awful feeling. Praying for peace for you tonight…! ❤

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